My plans started off good but I stepped in the yard and squish

So back in the house nudder cup o coffee and had some breakfast after that went to do some morning reading and the toilet wouldn't flush I tried plunging but it made a mess on the floor and splashed me. GRRRRRRRRR

Checked the breaker to the sewer pump then cleaned and checked the plug and checked for juice with a sander from the shed. Cleaned the plug put it back then plunged some more. Gave up and had a cup of coffee. Big ant pile right on the cover of the system so I poisoned um and was frustrated I couldn't check the down hole pump. Went back and gave it a hero plunge then hadda change clothes from dirty toilet water splashin me. Then mop the mess and wring the mop in a bucket not trusting the toilet. Sat down all frustrated with visions of pump trucks and the cost of a new down hole pump had another cup of coffee and prayed that I could do this with out too much expense. Praise the Lord I decided to try to flush it again and it went right down. Yes sometimes little miracles mean the most.
Now maybe I can run to da Pig and look for something for supper maybe fire up da pit but i'd hafta find my boots first.